Saturday, March 5, 2016

Partners: Evolution at the Relationship Level

Living beings exist on an  r/K continuum. Here, r refers to rapid practices to spread genes. Bacteria and dandelions are r practitioners.

Northeast Asians are K practitioners, investing heavily in few offspring.

I prefer to use the phrase r/K practices over r/K strategies because genes are incapable of strategies and many individuals are unconscious of their practices. JP Rushton's chart details evolutionary practices for three human races. Africans are closer to the r end of the spectrum.

After a few days or years of a relationship, individuals toward the r end feel rage at their spouses or partners for petty reasons. Sometimes the rage wells up from seemingly nowhere. The more self-controlled among them do not escalate to violence. They assume fault lies with the partner or figure the relationship is not a good match.

Yet earlier in relationships, they somehow fell in love or convinced themselves the relationships were worth pursuing. They fell for empty, heartfelt promises when warning signs abounded.

Those toward the r end use ad hominem attacks with their partners. Unlike the political realm where slurs easily manipulate, partners resist. Mutual contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling infect their relationships. They expect partners with feet of clay to provide endless amusement. They seldom assign self-blame for their own boredom or anxieties or character defects.

They look to save face and make partners villains.

In one night stands, there is often no rage, merely a little awkwardness the next day. The same goes for friends with benefits. Some may adopt an ironic triumphalism to mitigate awkwardness. High fives all around.


Time for a new partner.

"But don't you dare criticize my wanton, unconscious, mass destructive dysgenic escapades with your eugenic thinking. I can criticize you, but you can't criticize me."

Genetically adapted ("fit") behavior is not synonymous with genetically better or ethically better behavior. It's simply the practice that might leave the most copies of the same gene years from now. Some behaviors have no purpose at all.

Many r practitioners are not vaguely aware of being at the mercy of genes and environments. Others are fully aware they want to spread genes. Many low IQ tribal members understand seed spreading better than wealthy aesthetes.

"I did the work of making all these babies. Someone else should provide for them."

Egoism and misplaced altruism are both disastrous for societies and ethical individuals. Misplaced altruism is often worse than street crimes.

Humans generally engage in assortative mating, that is, mating with those similar to themselves. But r practitioners love tricking K practitioners, among others, into breeding. In ethical societies, r practitioners are severely punished for tricking or failing to provide. In unethical societies, they are rewarded. Societies decay. Contemporary propaganda from political, Hollywood, and Madison Avenue leaves many individuals vulnerable to exploitation.

An individual must make radical belief and environmental improvements to evade corrupting erosions, often with little outside help.

Even hate has an ethical purpose. Hating evils provides motivation, often enough to avoid corrupting erosions. In just wars, those with the most hate fight the hardest. They are more efficient. They have the most will to survive. They are less likely to have misplaced alienation and devotion.

But misplaced hatred leads to massive harms, especially in the political and personal relationship arenas.

Instead of clear, ethical individual roles, confusion and destruction reign. But there are ways out.

At the hedonic level, the promise of more fun seldom matches the reality. Individuals not predisposed to the dark triad (narcissism, psychopathy, and Machiavellianism) copy the fashionable dark triad practices of peers and celebrities, leading to abysmal results. Direct attempts at happiness lead to unhappiness and character destruction, the double paradoxes of hedonism.

Pursuing ethical goals, an indirect method, causes greater happiness as a side effect, the paradox of character. Partners pursuing shared ethical goals transcend self-defeating quests for hedonism.

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